Where Your Family Ate Dinner and What It Says About You

Dining Table, Separate Dining Room with family

Okay rich, in love and wealth.

Dining Table, Separate Dining Room alone

Okay rich. But listen, your dad had just made partner at the firm and needed to impress with long hours and your mom had to do those emergency surgeries in the NICU. You are now most likely a Coffee Table, Living Room (See below).

Dining Table, Separate Dining Room Disorganized

Okay rich, with divorcing parents.

Dining Table, Shared Room Organized

Okay middle-class! You probably ended up going to a very nice state school and you have an almond mom who thought a Nature Valley bar was candy.

Dining Table, Shared Room Disorganized

Thank your parents. They probably worked very hard to get you that meal and those camping trips. You ignored the mounting bills on the table to eat your SpaghettiOs. You still eat at a table that looks the exact same.

Counter, Kitchen

You had to eat quickly before or after coming home from swim practice or ballet rehearsal. You learned how to shovel hot microwaved stew into your mouth without burning your tongue. You were a busy child and your kids will be too.

Folding Table, Living Room

You were a member of the folding table family. This means the Jeopardy Daily Double was more important than what you did at school that day. As a child, one of your parents probably ate at the dining table alone (see above).

Coffee Table, Living Room

There was probably a lot going on that you didn’t realize. Your mother will tell you all about it in a trauma dump over coffee one random Sunday in your late thirties.

Lap, Living Room

You were the last one to enter the living room so the folding table and coffee table were taken. All that was left was a spot on the floor and your lap. You were the runt of your family.

Bed, Bedroom

Listen, as you know, it got better. Unless you were just playing endless hours of Fortnite and couldn’t be bothered to spend time with your folks who spent hours over the stove to cook you that meal. You know your sister ate dinner with family and where were you? Or you are just neurodivergent. This one is a center space on a bingo card.

Floor, Kitchen

You are the family pet.