Layoff Bingo: Holiday Edition

B I N G O
Wishing Rudolph could guide you through your state’s labyrinthine unemployment system “We’ll begin interviewing after the holidays” Glories stream from heaven afar: severance pay finally got deposited Friend looks at you like you said Christmas was cancelled Understanding that for you, Christmas actually is cancelled
Increasingly identifying with Bob Cratchit Buy multiple deeply discounted pumpkin pies in the week after Thanksgiving “Definitely looking to fill the opening sometime before Q2” The numbing realization that severance pay is subject to tax Relatives who haven’t applied to jobs in 20 years offering unsolicited advice
Sending job posting wish list to the North Pole Feeling joyful and triumphant at getting application through ATS recruitment software FREE SPACE

It’s a weird time of year”

Swallowing rage when friends complain about their company holiday parties “You could always apply to grad school!”
Keeping the thermostat at a temp only Frosty the Snowman would love Wondering if it’s too late to be a mall Santa “You could always go into the trades” Grinch-like indignation at local nonprofit’s holiday fundraiser request “Bet we’re headed for the second Great Depression”
Liberal indulgence in Christmas cookies Learning what a “ghost job” is and having a Heat Miser meltdown Losing track of the day sometime in the first week of December Having an informed opinion on all the latest Hallmark Christmas movies “Just relax and enjoy the time off!”